I have told my kids I don't want a funeral. Two weeks after I die I want them to throw a huge fish fry. Lots of fried fish, coleslaw with lots of pepper, homemade mac and cheese. And Dr Pepper. Maybe Sprite for the weaklings. Play all the 80's hair bands, some Metallica, and of course Prince. I have a playlist of some songs I want
- You are my Sunshine from the O Brother soundtrack
- Enter Sandman by Metallica
- the Blippi song
- Drop the World by Little Wayne
- Whiskey Lullaby by Allison Krause
- Eye of the Tiger by Survivor
- Lost by Gorilla Zoe
- Girls Just Wanna Have Fun by Cyndi Lauper
- Fat Bottomed Girls by Queen
I want everyone to eat and reminisce. Tell ridiculous stories about things I did or said. Tell my truth, not platitudes.
And then I want 2 dapper and well-dressed men to enter the gathering. These men are each about 30 years younger than me.
They mingle quietly while staring daggers at each other.
After a while, each one tells a different tale that seemingly has nothing to do with the person my family perceived me to be. The tales make me be a character out of an espionage novel. Tell everyone how together we saved the world, several times. One of them stomps his foot and declares that we became lovers during THE PANAMA INCIDENT! The other man is shocked by this announcement and drops his food. I want them to argue loudly over who was the love of my life. Then the men depart after telling my family they should be very proud of me.
My aunt Ann would drop her potato salad. Everyone would try to figure out what just happened. And what in the hell happened in Panama?
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